I Don't Trust

Read: Zechariah 1
“12 Then the Angel of the Lord said, O Lord of hosts, how long will You not have mercy and lovingkindness for Jerusalem and the cities of Judah, against which You have had indignation these seventy years? 13 And the Lord answered the angel who talked with me with gracious and comforting words.” Zechariah 1:12-13

Examine:
The intercession of the Angel of the LORD in this verse is unusual, for this divine Messenger is usually seen representing God to people rather than functioning in an intercessory role representing people to God.

Apply:
As I read this verse there are a couple of things that really jump out at me. I have a tendency to forget that God disciplines me. He is not mean and He is not a bully, but as a loving perfect Father He disciplines me when I am consistently wrong with my choices. When the pain of circumstances arise, I have to know that regardless of who or what is bringing them the will of my Father is to use it for my good. He is sovereign over my life and as long as I stay submitted to Him He will use the pain to strengthen me.

I am also reminded that I am called to act on behalf of the LORD, not defend myself. I hear those words echoing deep in my heart this morning. I must learn to trust God to take care of the things affecting me personally. He has given angels charge over me. He has given Jesus to advocate for me. I have to rest and trust in this truth. Whenever I take charge of defending myself I prolong the discipline in my life and lose the blessing that comes from God Himself restoring what has been lost.

Pray:
I really do not trust You. I could spend some time weighing my words more carefully and could repackage that in a statement that sounds way less blunt but the truth would become hidden. I do not trust You. I am afraid that if I do not take care of myself people will consume me and You will do nothing to stop them.

I also do not care about Your Kingdom as much as I care about mine. My anger burns far more often over people offending me than it does them resisting You. My heart is broken over my own pain far more often than it is broken over the pain You feel. You have asked that I pour out my life to see Your Kingdom come to earth. You have asked that I storm the strongholds of this earth to see them torn down for You. I cannot do that as long as I am focused on advancing my petty little kingdom on earth.

I pray today that my trust in You be firm and that my deepest rest and peace would be in knowing that You are my defender and provider. I also ask that my deepest longing and only passion be seeing Your kingdom come.