Crucial Crossroads

Scripture: "Now Saul was afraid of David, for the LORD was with him but had departed from Saul. Therefore Saul…" 1 Samuel 18:12

Observation: Saul's downward spiral continued. In the verses before this, Saul tried to kill David but David escaped. Saul was coming to fully face the fact that God's Spirit had left him and was given to David in great measure. At this point, Saul faces a crucial crossroads in his life. He realized the circumstances. He knew the will of God. Now he had to make a choice. I can't help but wonder how things would have changed for Saul had he chosen a different path. What would have become of his life? Jealousy. Eight of the most destructive letters ever penned. That was Saul's choice and that was Saul's result.

Application: The scriptures tell us that the eyes are never full of seeing. That is so very true. My eyes. The windows of my soul. They capture images and send them to my mind which initiates a sequencing of decisions. These decisions lead to outcomes in my life. Normally all this happens subconsciously, but on occasion I enter this process fully aware of what is taking place. In these moments God gives me the ability to assess where I am and offers me an opportunity to change my course.

As I look back at my life I realize that any season that represented a great trial or a great season of growth was proceeded by a crucial cross road. I entered a place where I knew the way I was acting was not leading in a good direction and God offered me a choice. I could continue pursuing the lifestyle of others I coveted or I could choose His path for my life. The choices I made in these crossroads are mixed. Some good. Some bad. While the choices vary, the results are absolute. The only peace in my life results when I choose wisely.

Knowing that, why is it that it is still so hard to make the right choice? I am so often tempted to make the same bad choices in my life. Often I sit in amazement at my own stupidity. Jealously is often my greatest downfall. Somebody seems to have something that I want but do not have. This creates inside of me a desire for something unhealthy. I am faced with a decision to confess it or let it go. I know better, yet…

Prayer: Your grace and patience are Your most amazing qualities to me. I guess that is because I rely on them the most. I am so grateful that You never let go of me. Even during times of my life that I have blatantly rebelled against You; You were right there with me. You never let go. Through the discipline and pain that resulted from my decisions; You were right there with me. At times I look back and I mourn over the loss of time I have experienced in rebellion. I wish that it were different. But at the same time, I realize that I am who I am because You molded me through those times. Thank you for the gift of Your grace and the care and patience You have taken in growing me. I am not proud of the past, but I am at peace with the present. My decisions are getting better and that is an amazing gift.

As I face the day, I know that regardless of where I am, I am always only one observation away from starting a chain reaction of decisions that will lead to a downward spiral such as the one that Saul is experiencing. Open up my heart and examine it for anything that would cause me to be led astray. At the end of the day, may I have the peace of knowing I chose a path that honored Your name and held onto Your spirit.